Brokenhearted
Scripture says that God is close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18), and it is only when I’m there that I remember how true that is. I wrote the title of this blog post over a year and a half ago, but it wasn’t until this week that I felt motivated to finish it.
You see, a dear friend of mine passed away recently. Although I know he is with the Lord now, the pain of his passing stings. I use passing rather than loss because he isn’t lost. We know where he is; he has joined our Father in Heaven.
Since his passing, my eyes have been opened to the value of good company and the way in which God works through the people in our lives.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
Good Company
I say “good” company because there are people in each of our lives who bring us toward God and people who separate us from Him.
“Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” (1 Corinthians 15:33)
Ever heard that you are the product of your five closest friends? What does that mean for you?
Sooner or later, the individuals we surround ourselves with begin to influence how we think and behave. That’s why it’s important to surround ourselves with people who challenge us in our faith. Do our friends build us up and bring us closer to God? Or do they distance us from Him?
“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” (Proverbs 13:20)
By reflecting on and praying over our relationships, we can more clearly see how we are being impacted by the people in our lives. This could be a relationship, friendship, acquaintance, etc. Do the people you invest your time and energy into support you in your journey with Christ? Are they on that journey with you?
It’s crucial to have relationships with other followers of Christ, for they encourage us and hold us accountable. They’re honest and bring us back to God when we stray.
“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25 ESV)
Support System
“Good” company also means having a support system. My friend’s recent passing was painful. I needed people to lean on. People to talk to. People to grieve with.
In your brokenness, do you have confidence that the people around you come to your aid? Will they support you and encourage you? Do they stand by you in times of trial?
I call this a battle-tested friendship. These are the friends who’ve stood by us during times of adversity. When we’ve been broken, lonely, judged, or lost, these are the friends who’ve stood by our sides.
The Bible shows us what battle-tested friendship looks like. Take Elijah and Elisha, for instance. They stuck by each other’s sides like brothers (Proverbs 17:17).When The Lord was prepared to take Elijah, Elisha stayed by his side until the very end.
“Elijah said to Elisha, ‘Stay here; the LORD has sent me to Bethel.’ But Elisha said, ‘As surely as the LORD lives and as you live, I will not leave you.’ So they went down to Bethel” (2 Kings 2:2).
We need battle-tested friendships and encouragers in our lives. It’s easy to let doubt creep in and keep us from living boldly in our faith. How is God supposed to work through us when we don’t answer His call? God has gifted many with the spiritual gift of encouragement.
When I doubt the way God works through me or struggle to take a leap of faith, I need those encouragers in my life to call me out. I need to be challenged to trust what God is doing. That’s the power of relationships. We build each other up and stand strong hand in hand. That’s what God intended for us. That’s relationship. Community. Church.
“For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you— that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.” (Romans 1:11-12)
Accountability
I’m going to circle back quick to my previous point of accountability. It is far more difficult to hold ourselves accountable than to do so with others. For example, I’ll be the first to admit that I struggle to read the Bible regularly on my own. Or to go to church alone.
Since I’ve started working through daily Bible plans with others and found my weekly church buddy, I have been far more accountable. Not only because I have someone reminding me but because I’m also reminding someone else.
I have a partner that I’m growing in Christ with. Someone who is on that journey with me. That is the power of a relationship in Christ. Joining groups, starting devotionals, and going to church with someone are all ways that I have personally seen my relationship with Christ grow.
During the pandemic, I didn’t have that. Church was online. I wasn’t seeing people regularly. The lack of community made it difficult to hold myself accountable. In all honesty, I quit tuning into services and hadn’t picked up my Bible in months. I started feeling more distant from God than usual.
It wasn’t until I joined a Bible study that I finally got back into the habit of spending time with God again. We have the ability to build each other up and help one another grow. We need encouragers, but we also need to BE encouragers.
Company you Keep
Be mindful of the company you keep. Surround yourselves with encouragers, who build you up in your times of doubt; a support system, who you can lean on in your brokenness, trials, and grievances; “good” company, who will hold you accountable and walk with you on your journey for Christ.
While mourning the loss of my friend, I needed my support system– my “good” company, who prayed and put things into perspective for me. Those relationships are valuable. Relationship itself is valuable. God intended us to build relationships with not only Him but with each other (Genesis 2:18). And not just any relationships– good company.
Prayer for Community
“For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”” (Matthew 18:20 ESV)
So, let us pray together. Dear Heavenly Father, we pray that You guide us toward relationships with other Christ-followers. Lord, we thank You for the people You have already placed in our lives who support us, encourage us, hold us accountable, and bring us closer to You. As for the people in our lives who separate us from You, we ask that You help us show them Your love through our words and actions, or that we find the courage needed to step away from said relationships. If this may be the case, we pray that You bring new, godly relationships into our lives. We understand that our relationship with You comes first, and good company helps us grow in this relationship. We acknowledge that “as iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). Lord, we pray that You help us find people in our lives who will sharpen us, and for whom we may do the same. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen!
“All of you together are Christ’s body, and each of you is a part of it.” 1 Corinthians 12:25-27 NLT.
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